Sunday, September 28, 2008

sesuatu

berdiam
terduduk
tak mahu bersuara
kerna kau bukan aku
menari dan berlari
mengharap sepi yang menyendiri membawaku pergi
aku dan mereka
mereka dan kamu
hati ini terlampau gusar
jangan bertengkar pada perkara yang besar
nanti ada yang tersasar

diam
tunduk
dan berikhtiar

kau tahu apa yang aku putarkan.

Friday, September 19, 2008

them in my life.

whenever i talk about my family n friends back in malaysia, i will sound sad. but , dis time , in this post, im a bit excited because the hari raya is near, therefore, november is near.

i am very excited to go back to malaysia. yes. i really am , indeed.

my family.
i miss my family so much . maybe because they are the one that i normally go to when i have problems or i wana tell sumting dat is super exciting. especially my mum n sis. we can share stories like we are best friends. seriously , sumtimes people think dat me n my sis kinda rude to my mum by layaning her like our best friends, like bertepuk tampar n all, but , we are like dat. due to that kinda relationship, i never felt different or weird or anything if i wana tell my mum anything about me n my life. even how hot is justin to me, shes very aware of dat. n my sis. altho shes very alim because she went into sekolah agama n then now doing her law degree at uia, but she can actually accept for who i am ( not dat i say dat im not alim, but not DAT alim). hehheh. maybe because shes so damn baik, she normally treat me like a big sis because i am more ganas n firm dari dia. my bro , i miss him. altho hes being so super nakal n sumtimes masuk in the jahat category , but , i think ive been in that position before with all my frens. teenagers~. haahhaha. n my dad. he is the major reason y am i here in brisbane. at first, he force me to do dis, but now , im starting to see that this thing is relevant.

he wants me to be here so that i can study overseas + shopping like there is no yesterday.hhahahha.

nolah. shopping is one of the reason , but he knows me very well. it just, sumtimes, i couldnt notice it.

my friends.
i dun think anyone of my friends actually have friendship like mine. its weird, but real. like what nadia commented in my blog, ' you make it real for me' . they ( nad, etil, khif, farid n fadirul) are super weird, but they are wondeful friends. miss lepaking at pak li mabuk kopi, stalking the nyahs at lorong haji taib, makan besar at asia cafe, n lots of stupid stuff dat we do together .theyll be there for you when u need it and they say real things to u . like if i ask them whether my shoes or anything are cute, they will definitely say no if they think its not. i mean , i know its kinda harsh, but , they telling me the truth. dats y i love them so much. i dun see y people can actually tipu their frens just to jaga hati sedangkan ur frens are those people who are supposed to say real things to u. whether its good or bad, theyll be with u.

my boyfriend.
i miss him very much. he was there for me back then in malaysia, n so do now. im a one lucky girl, to be with him. lotsa challenges, but we always worked things out. as long as we dun stop believing in god and each other, we will be ok.

i just got my allowance. 6000 aud. im kinda worried last few days because im the only one who gt it late. a week late. since i have sum money to shop, the one that i normally keep every month, i have to not use it last week for shopping because im afraid that the money is not coming in. n since its here, ive started shopping last few days , which i really love the feeling when i shop. hehehhe. reminds me of the gud old days back at malaysia. ill post a blog on my shopping spree later.

i got 2 assignments to go before hari raya. and so far , im doing ok with it.

one n a half month to go.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

it stopped.

when my mum said "sumtimes u wont get what u really want" ,

she really mean it.

Monday, September 1, 2008

finding myself.

ive been thinking a lot lately about whats happening in my life n other stuff around me. makes me cry, smile, laugh and sad. it just complicated.

home.
yes. i miss home. although i stil only have around 2 months to go before my flight back to malaysia, but i really miss home so much. and plus, is now ramadhan. since in one of those PBSM (persatuan balik setiap minggu) girls at ipba, i always wil be there at home for bukak puasa , at least every weekend. it just feel different without my family around. man, i really miss them. not just by the food, n the money , ehem, that they give me , but most importantly , their love.

friends.
aww.. man.. dis one, very sensitive. i can easily cried because of dat. i miss my frens so much.very2. they make me feel as a whole when we r together. because they let me be myself. n i can see how myself really r when with them.they just make me feel good n happy. they make me feel complete. yes, complete.

love.
tough one. its almost 2 years, n its getting more challenging especially when 2 hearts r so far away. we tend to be so emotional about that. n god really2 testing on our love now.

study.
kinda malas these few days. n i totally hate myself more dis semester. i need more time to do assignments. thank god i start early.but compared to last semester, i think i am more enthusiastic in learning sumting last semester. i duno y.

financial.
my money in the bank can stand until early october. for all the bills, food n leisure. i really hope te allowance wil be coming these few weeks. since , i havent ask any money from my parents , i really hope dat i dun have to do dat. im learning to stand on my own since i came here to australia. learning to take responsible of my own financial.

my malaysia.
waiting for 16th of september. been praying hard. never felt so emotional when talking about malaysia, but i really hope that its not going to end up like how people r describing it. we could not afford any changes in the government. i love my country, n people, please start appreciate ur own country. make it happen - unity. when u r overseas, u wil understand dis : "hujan emas di negara org, hujan batu di negara sendiri, lebih baik di negara sendiri". unity, dat wat makes us, a malaysian.

current interest.
sleeping and my new iPhone.i just bought an iPhone. 16gb. loving it very much. a pink+black iPhone which i named it pinkrain.


i really hope stuffs wil be fine.

2 months to go.